Baked Beans & Burnout

god, i love alliteration. can you tell?

sweet treats and the sweetest boys

When I last wrote, it was all about the return of Baked Beans.

First, if you ordered a Baked Beans box and I got to see you on Sunday, THANK YOU! Thank you for purchasing. Thank you for supporting. And most importantly, thank you for giving the cats enough attention—that’ll hold ‘em over for at least the end of the week.

If you aren’t familiar with Baked Beans, it was (is) a bake sale box I sold and created when I was unemployed to create a little income for myself. This project not only helped me hold things down financially while I figured the rest out, but dare I say that Baked Beans helped me find my culinary creative voice?

Unemployment, while simultaneously a trying time, was also one of the most fruitfully creative times I’ve ever experienced. I felt inspired, and had the space and bandwidth to explore my wildest ideas—something I’m learning is pretty effing hard to do with a full-time job. When I went back to work, I knew that Baked Beans could no longer go on at a monthly pace—as much as I wanted it to—and that something would eventually have to give (e.g. I’m now retired from my life as a spin instructor)! I had other things to focus on, spin classes to teach, and a full 9-hr/day, Monday through Friday gig (for the health insurance, of course).

But lately, I’ve been feeling pretty burned out—exhausted past the point of being able to keep my place tidy and the dishes out of the sink on a day to day basis—let alone lean in to my creativity and seek out inspiration. Okay, fine. I’m really burned out. In fact, burnout is what’s kept me away for the past few weeks and it’s what’s made me reflect on just how much I need to make more time for myself, regardless of what’s going on at work.

We can’t pour from an empty cup, amirite?

But how do we do it all? Have a stable job with a steady paycheck and health insurance, AND be artists? How is it possible if we only have so many hours in a day/week/lifetime?

I do not have the answer to this, but I’m sure as hell exploring what it can look like for myself.

Lately, it’s looked like taking walks on my lunch break to shoot some film photography. It’s getting into film photography for the first time and embracing the humble beginnings where it feels like everything you make is “just okay.” It’s spending the first thirty minutes of my work day having breakfast with myself with a good song on. It’s looked like reminding myself of the things I love to do—like creating beautiful bake sale boxes and feeding my friends—and using my PTO to do so when I can.

It’s also looked like knowing where my limits are (and knowing when I’m pushing myself a little too hard). I’ve tried to go to three concerts this year—except I’ve only made it to one of them. Concerts, while an outside activity (I am an indoor kind of girl), are usually something that excite me, so I’ve been a little discouraged to learn that I just haven’t had the energy these days. Why? Because sometimes a night in with my little snuggle bugs is what I need more than a night out—even if that night out is inspiring and creatively stimulating, and food for the soul. Because sometimes when we push too hard, food for the soul becomes obligatory—and who wants to do more of that?

So this Baked Beans box is more than just a beautiful box with unique flavors and four sweets that tell one delicious story. It’s a reclamation of my time, of my creative energy, and a reminder to myself that sharing my art with others can be the thing that grounds me the most.

---

When will Baked Beans be back? In the Summer, for a potentially picnic themed box… but I’m also exploring the idea of doing a summer birthday-themed box.

1. I have a summer birthday(ish—it’s in May but school was always out by then ok?!)

2. Summer birthdays were hard because school was out and all of your friends were on vacation so I’m just saying… what if we DID celebrate them now?!

3. I think I’m onto something.

And yes, I’ve heard you loud and clear: THE PEOPLE WANT FOCACCIA!!!